Monday, March 06, 2006

Munich

An important piece of film that should be seen by everyone.

I thought that this film should have received an Oscar.

This thought-provoking film examines the terrorist attacks on the Israeli Olympic team during the 1972 summer games.

The film is loosely adapted from the book, Vengeance, by George Jonas.

This is Steven Spielberg's greatest and most important work since Schindler's List.

Eric Bana plays the son of an Israeli hero who is commissioned to kill the Palestinian terrorists responsible for the massacre. Bana is the leader of four other guys who were chosen to carry out the mission. The movie feels like a real life Mission: Impossible.

The movie, however, is very compelling. We can see that the small team of five is very patriotic in the beginning. They also seem reluctant to kill another human life. After their first kill, they seem to be losing their reluctance. They seem to become jaded and tougher. They still continue to struggle though. After watching the news, they can see that more Israelis are being killed in retaliation for their killings of the Palestinians.

Are they doing the right thing? Are they accomplishing anything? Will this help peace or make things worse?

We can see that Bana had to choose between serving his country and being with his pregnant wife who was about to give birth to their baby girl. We see the internal turmoils he was going through as he traveled most of Europe in hunting down the killers. He broke down in tears as he heard his baby daughter say, "Dada" over the phone.

Killing Palestinians was also a very expensive endeavor. It costed about $300,000 per kill. Most of the money went to a seedy French mafia who provided the intelligence to them.

Towards the end, we can see Bana breaking down with paranoia. He's worried that someone is hunting him and his family down.

This movie is great in that it shows the human drama behind what must have happened. They even showed some of the Palestinians' side of why they were killing Israelites. The Palestinians felt that they were being killed by the Israelites. They want to set up a country of their own, Palestine. Israel didn't have a country of their own for many years. Palestinians are going through the same thing now that Israel went through before.

This movie wonderfully displays the consequences of kiling. We see that killing is not the answer. Revenge only breeds more revenge. Things seem to only escalate after each killing.

The good: Powerful, thought-provoking.

The bad: Went a little long. The story may have been too dramatized.

The verdict: An important piece of work that shows the consequences of killing.

My rating: A, 92.

My, Myself, and Irene: Stealing baby's milk. Shame on you, Jim Carrey! Posted by Picasa

Me, Myself, and Irene

A funny Jim Carrey comedy that showcases his two personalities.

I can't say that I subscribe to Carrey's line of physical comedy, but sometimes the hijinks he gets into are freakin' hilarious.

In this film, Carrey's beautiful wife runs off their chauffeur they hired for their wedding. Carrey's a Rhode Island State Trooper who lives in a tiny house. His wife happens to be the President of the Mensa Society. The African-American midget chauffeur says that he's also in Mensa. Carrey's wife falls in love with the genius midget and they run off together. Carrey is left taking care of the half-black triplets fathered by the midget. I have to get those t-shirts with a picture of Sarah for me and one with a picture of me for Sarah. That'd be great.

After years of taking in people's abuse without sticking up for himself, he finally cracks. His mind develops a second personality that is rude and aggressive, named Hank. His nice guy self is named Charlie. Everyone takes advantage of Charlie's niceness. Even a little girl tells him to "@#$% off!"

Anyway, Charlie is told to escort Renee Zellweger, who is followed by bad guys that are trying to kill her.

This movie is a good blend of Jim Carrey's two styles of comedy. Charlie represents the nice Jim Carrey like in the movies, The Truman Show and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.

Hank represents Carrey's more physical humor side like in The Mask and The Pet Detective. I wasn't into Carrey's movies until I saw The Pet Detective. I still remember cracking up hysterically when he came out the rear end of the rhinoceros machine. He was in the serengetti and he started getting really hot. He takes off all his clothes. He tries to get out, but the handle inside breaks. He finds a small hole in the machine and struggles to get out. The family that was on safari thought that a rhino just gave birth to Jim Carrey. That was great.

I didn't really like Hank, but he did make for some funny scenes. Hank pushes a breast-feeding infant out of the way and starts breast-feeding from the baby's mother.

There were some stupid things in the movie like his genius half-black triplets. First of all, they didn't look like triplets. They didn't look half white. All they did was say the "F" word every other word. It was a lame running gag that should have been terminated a lot sooner.

Carrey was a crazy Jekyll and Hyde who kept fighting with himself most of the movie.

The bad guys were also really stupid. Bad guys in movies never make any sense. Sometimes, they can kill a ton of innocent people within seconds, but they can't kill the good guys with a gun. In the train scene, Carrey fights with the main bad guy and gets beat up. Zellweger grabs a dildo from her bag and knocks the bad guy out. How the heck is that possible? I have no first hand experience with one, believe me, but it seems like a dildo is just a rubbery plastic thingamajig. --Hardly something that can knock out a bad guy.

Also, when the bad guy grabs Zellweger in the last scene, he takes her out to a bridge to kill her. If all he wanted to do was kill her, why didn't he just shoot her? Carrey manages to get close enough to the bad guy to grab his gun. Carrey then gets his thumb blown off. Why didn't the bad guy just shoot him sooner? Movie villains are so dumb.

The Good: Hilarious scenes. It's a great "feel good" movie.

The Bad: A lot of dumb scenes and even dumber bad guys.

The Verdict: Another funny Farrelly Brothers and Jim Carrey movie.

My rating: B, 86.

Friday, March 03, 2006

Do You Guys Think I Should Be a Movie Critic?

What do you guys think of my movie reviews? Do you think I'm good enough to be a movie critic? I think that would be my dream job--just watching movies all the time and telling you what I think about them. That might be my next career. I'm not sure if it's my tendency for escapism or if it's just my natural talent.

I'm just getting over my food poision-induced nausea. I'm feeling much better than before. Tuesday was the longest day I've ever had. I don't think anyone else would force themself to go to work if they were as sick as I was that day. I was throwing up and feeling really nasty. I could hardly hold my head up. My back started hurting because I couldn't even sit up straight at my desk. I had to stay at work 'til late since I went to the doctor's during the day too.

I'm still not 100%. I'm still having all my symptoms that I've been having lately. My wrist hurts from my skateboard accident. My leg and hip is all scabby. I still have to wake up several times in the middle of the night to go pee and I have IBS symptoms. I feel like I've had to struggle all my life. Ever since I was a kid, I've had to struggle a lot more than others just to get by. Woe is me.

Thursday, March 02, 2006


Sahara: Better left buried in the desert forever Posted by Picasa

Sahara

Where do I start with this stinker of a movie?

Sorry to say, but Sahara was a boring adventure. And "boring adventure" is an oxymoron. An adventure, by its definition, is an exciting undertaking. This movie was about as fun as watching a lecture about the proper ways to worship Allah and Mohammed. I hope I don't get burned alive in a protest over my metaphor.

Basically, the story is about Matthew McConaughey looking for an old Civil War ironclad warship called the CSS Texas that dissappeared about 150 years ago. McConaughey believes it's lost somewhere in the Sahara Desert and goes there to find it. Along the way, he hooks up with Penelope Cruz, a World Health Organization ("WHO") doctor who is trying to find out the source of a plague that is rapidly killing people in Nigeria. The movie is based on a novel of the same name.

The movie starts off with a scene of the CSS Texas in a Civil War battle. Then, it cuts into the opening credits with some really awful music. Nothing exciting happens for the first 40 minutes of the movie. I'm being totally serious. I kept watching it hoping that something interesting will happen. There was a decent boat chase scene after the first 40 minutes. Then, another series of long boring conversations ensued that put me to sleep.

The music in the movie sucked. It had no congruent theme. Sometimes, it played Nigerian tribal music, other times, it had random music from bad bands. I was hoping that this movie was going to be similar to Indiana Jones. Boy, was I disappointed.

I noticed that an epic adventure movie needs catchy theme music like Indiana Jones. Whenever you hear the music from Indiana Jones, you instantly recognize it and reminisce about your fond moments from the film. In this movie, and most movies you see today, you can hardly remember any of the music from the movie. Music is extremely important to building a memorable cinematic experience.

The acting was fine. I just thought the script and timing of the movie reeked. This Indiana Jones wannabe was neither fun nor funny. The first half of the movie was too serious and somber. Penelope was worried about people dying from a strange new disease. McConaughey blabbed on about why he believed the CSS Texas is lost in Nigeria. Geez, they spent a heck of a long time setting up the story, and then the second half of the movie turned out to be a ridiculous, mindless, nonsensical tale.

There were just a few decent action sequences. But we all know that a few good scenes does not a good action adventure film make.

The train heist by camelback was like a wild west train robbery Nigerian style. That was ok. The movie has somewhat satisfactory action scenes between the long periods of boredom. But, even the supposedly fun parts of the film are subpar compared to other action flicks.

McConaughey and his buddy go sailing across the desert on an old wrecked plane using one of its wings as a sail. Then, the '60's song, "Magic Carpet Ride" by Steppenwolf comes on.

The fighting scene on top of the giant solar energy plant with all those mirrors was okay, but not great.

McConaughey's sidekick takes out all the dynamite from the self-destruct device. When the plant's 5000 degree furnace goes on, his sidekick jumps and manages avoiding getting directly in the path of the flames. However, he was clearly close enough to become burnt barbeque. No one could survive 5000 degrees that close to the flames. You need to be like at least several yards away to avoid getting burnt. He walks away without even one hair singed. Nonsense!

The ending had the most action, but of course, was highly improbable. And, it wasn't even that good compared to better action movies.

Let me tell you about how improbable it was. When the trio was being chased in their car by the bad guy's helicopter, they throw the sticks of dynamite out the car. Miraculously, the explosions uncovers the Texas ironclad warship that they've been looking for. Wow!

The three of them run in and fire one of the ancient canons and blow up the bad guy's helicopter. Bah humbug!

The ending was closer to what an action adventure film should be, but the rest of the movie was hella boring. It looks like the director didn't know how he wanted to shoot this movie, so he tried using different techniques during different parts of the movie.

In the end, the story never really explains why or how the ironclad ended up in the Sahara. Also, the whole story about the CSS Texas is fake just like National Treasure telling false stories of actual historical events. The CSS Texas never disappeared. It actually never went into battle, but was sold. Why do they use real historical events, people, and things, and tell fake stories? I don't like that. It's better to just use make believe things set in historical times than use actual historical things people can research and find the truth about.

Highs: Acting ain't so bad. A few decent action sequences described above.

Lows: Bad story, script, timing, tone, setting, mood, music, no real theme, no emotion, and no direction. The good guys were boring. The bad guys' roles were so sanitized, I didn't even hate them. In the end, I didn't have any strong feelings for anybody.

The Verdict: From the photos, it seemed like a modern Indiana Jones adventure. However, it turns out the movie doesn't know what it wants to be. It turns out to be a very dull dud.

My rating: D-, 60.

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Top 50 Things To Do In an Elevator

I usually do nothing but stare in front of me when I'm on an elevator. This list will help me "break the ice" with people on a dumbwaiter.


1. Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
2. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your tissue to other passengers.
3. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, “Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!”
4. Whistle the first seven notes of ‘It’s a Small World’ incessantly.
5. Sell Girl Scout cookies.
6. On a long ride, crash from side to side as if you’re on rough seas.
7. Shave. (Especially if you’re a woman.)
8. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask: “Got enough air in there?”
9. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
10. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
11. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
12. Lean over to another passenger and whisper: “Noogie patrol coming!”
13. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you, “Admiral”.
14. One word: Flatulence!
15. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go “plink” at the bottom.
16. Do Tai Chi exercises.
17. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce, “I’ve got new socks on!”
18. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back, “Oh, not now. Damn motion sickness!”
19. Give religious literature to each passenger.
20. Meow occasionally.
21. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
22. Frown and mutter “Gotta go, gotta go,” then sigh and say, “oops!”
23. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
24. Sing, “Mary Had a Little Lamb,” while continually pushing buttons.
25. Holler, “Chutes away!” whenever the elevator descends.
26. Walk on with a cooler that says “human head” on the side.
27. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce, “You’re one of THEM!” and move to the far corner of the elevator.
28. Burp, and then say “Mmmm…tasty!”
29. Leave a box between the doors.
30. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.
31. Wear a puppet on your hand and make it talk to the other passengers.
32. Start a sing-along.
33. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, “Is that your beeper?”
34. Play the harmonica.
35. Shadow box.
36. Say, “Ding!” at each floor.
37. Lean against the button panel.
38. Say, “I wonder what all these do,” and push the red buttons.
39. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
40. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your “personal space”.
41. Bring a chair along.
42. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: “Wanna see wha in muh mouf?”
43. Blow spit bubbles.
44. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
45. Announce in a demonic voice: “I must find a more suitable host body.”
46. Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.
47. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
48. Wear “X-Ray Specs” and leer suggestively at other passengers.
49. Stare at your thumb and say, “I think it’s getting larger.”
50. If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler, “Bad touch!”

Raging Bull


Bull, originally uploaded by David Kim.

Remind me never to become a bullfighter.


The Central Library in L.A. First floor. Sorry all the pictures are mixed up. I blame Picasa's Hello for the screw up. If I load the pictures too quickly, they get uploaded out of order. Even though I'm still nauseated, I went out and took some pictures. I'm usually always in the office and hardly ever go out. I thought getting some fresh air would help me. Anyway, this guy in this picture saw me holding up my camera when I was trying to take this picture. It looked like he wanted to get out of the way or see who I was taking a picture of, but he was too late. Posted by Picasa

The ceiling of the 2nd Floor Posted by Picasa

Second Floor Posted by Picasa

Second Floor of the Central Library. Posted by Picasa

The ceiling of the Central Library. Posted by Picasa

Looking down from the 3rd floor Posted by Picasa

They should make a waterslide for people that work here. Posted by Picasa

Farmer's market Posted by Picasa

Central Library. Third floor. Posted by Picasa

Some funky orange outdoor artwork.  Posted by Picasa

Farmer's market on 5th Street. It's open every Wednesday. Posted by Picasa

Nice office building. This is at the Bank of America building. Posted by Picasa