Mammograms

>This is a cute way to send "the message"! There is a serious message at the

end, but you get to laugh on the way there. Now go out and have your mammies

grammed!

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>>Perfect Breasts

> (o)(o)

>

>Fake Silicone Breasts

> ( + )( + )

>

>Perky Breasts

> (*)(*)

>

>Big Nipple Breasts

> (@)(@)

>

>A Cups

> o o

>

>D Cups

> { O }{ O }

>

>Wonder Bra Breasts

> (oYo)

>

>Cold Breasts

> ( ^ )( ^ )

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>Lopsided Breasts

> (o)(O)

>

>Pierced Nipple Breasts

> (Q)(O)

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>Hanging Tassels Breasts

> (p)(p)

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>Grandma's Breasts

> \ o /\ o /

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>Against The Shower Door Breasts

> ( )( )

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>Android Breasts

> | o | | o |

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> Mammogram Breasts

> ___ ___

>

>For years and years they told me,

>Be careful of your breasts.

>Don't ever squeeze or bruise them.

>And give them monthly tests.

>

>So I heeded all their warnings,

>And protected them by law.

>Guarded them very carefully,

>And I always wore my bra.

>

>After 30 years of astute care,

>My gyno, Dr.. Pruitt,

>Said I should get a Mammogram

>"O.K," I said, "let's do it."

>

>"Stand up here real close" she said,

>(She got my boob in line),

>"And tell me when it hurts," she said,

>"Ah yes! Right there, that's fine."

>

>She stepped upon a pedal,

>I could not believe my eyes!

>A plastic plate came slamming down,

>My hooter's in a vise!

>

>My skin was stretched and mangled,

>From underneath my chin.

>My poor boob was being squashed,

>To Swedish Pancake thin.

>

>Excruciating pain I felt,

>Within it's vise-like grip.

>A prisoner in this vicious thing,

>My poor defenseless tit!

>

>"Take a deep breath" she said to me,

>Who does she think she's kidding?!?

>My chest is mashed in her machine,

>And woozy I am getting..

>

>"There, that's good," I heard her say,

>(The room was slowly swaying.)

>"Now, let's have a go at the other one."

>Have mercy, I was praying.

>

>It squeezed me from both up and down,

>It squeezed me from both sides.

>I'll bet SHE'S never had this done,

>To HER tender little hide.

>

>Next time that they make me do this,

>I will request a blindfold.

>I have no wish to see again,

>My knockers getting steam rolled.

>

>If I had no problem when I came in,

>I surely have one now.

>If there had been a cyst in there,

>It would have gone "ker-pow!"

>

>This machine was created by a man,

>Of this, I have no doubt.

>I'd like to stick his balls in there,

>And see how THEY come out!