Monday, July 25, 2005

Some churchy jokes

Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to hermother, "Why is the bride dressed in white?" "Because white is thecolor of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life." Thechildthought about this for a moment, then said, "So why is the groom wearingblack?"

---------------------------------------------------A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running as fast as shecould, trying not to be late for Bible class. As she ran she prayed,"Dear Lord, please don't let me be late! Dear Lord, please don't let mebelate!"While she was running and praying, she tripped on a curb and fell,getting her clothes dirty and tearing her dress. She got up, brushedherselfoff, and started running again. As she ran she once again began to pray,"Dear Lord, please don't let me be late... But please don't shove meeither!"


-------------------------------------------------A little girl became restless as the preacher's sermon dragged on andon. Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered, "Mommy, if wegive him the money now, will he let us go?"

-----------------------------------------------An elderly woman died last month. Having never married, she requestedno male pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions for her memorialservice she wrote, "They wouldn't take me out while I was alive, I don'twantthem to take me out when I'm dead.

----------------------------------------------A police recruit was asked during the exam, "What would you do if youhad to arrest your own mother?" He said, "Call for backup."

---------------------------------------------A Sunday school teacher asked the children just before she dismissedthem to go to church, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?"Anniereplied, "Because people are sleeping."

----------------------------------------------Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesuswith them to Jerusalem. A small child replied "They couldn't get a babysitter."

------------------------------------------------A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with herfive and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor thyfather and thy mother," she asked "Is there a commandment that teachesushowto treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one littleboyanswered, "Thou shall not kill."

-----------------------------------------------At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything,including human beings. Little Johnny seemed especially intent when theytold himhow Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs. Later in the week hismothernoticed him lying down as though he were ill, and said, "Johnny, what isthe matter?" Little Johnny responded, "I have pain in my side. I thinkI'mgoing to have a wife."

------------------------------------------------Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after hearing strongpreachingon the devil. One said to the other, "What do you think about all thisSatanstuff?" The other boy replied, "Well, you know how Santa Claus turnedout.It's probably just your dad."

------------------------------------------------"How come you're late?" asked the bartender, as the blonde waitresswalked into the bar. "It was awful," she explained. "I was walking downElmstreet and there was a terrible accident. A man was thrown from his carandhewas lying in the middle of the street. His leg was broken, his skull wasfractured, and there was blood everywhere. Thank God I took thatfirst-aid course." "What did you do?" asked the bartender. "I sat downandput myhead between my knees to keep from fainting.

Saturday, July 23, 2005

B.A.S.E. jumping

Click on the title of this post to see an awesome B.A.S.E. jumping video. I want to try this so bad. All I need to do is make a parachute or steal Mary Poppins' umbrella.

The Sith Rejects

Click on the title of this post to see an animated presentation of The Sith Rejects. Little did we know that there were a lot of Darths before George Lucas chose Vader.


Thursday, July 21, 2005

Rosso

Check out Rockstar Brian Greenwood's band, Rosso, with these links:

www.rosso-band.com

www.myspace.com/briangreenwood

I met him at work. He's an attorney, rock star, poet, and a tennis coach. He has amazing talent. Sarah and I are going to see him in his next concert.

Hey, Brian.





You can also buy his book, "Hate to Feel" from BarnesandNoble.com:

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=Uh6ZunrBJ6&isbn=0595228410&itm=1

It has really good reviews.

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

The Law Firm

Watch "The Law Firm" on NBC Thursday, July 28, 2005-9/8 PM. Click on the link to see my friend from law school, Kelly Chang, go for $250,000. I hope she wins.

http://www.nbc.com/The_Law_Firm/bios/

It's a reality tv show about attorneys. It looks like The Apprentice, except it deals with lawyers working on real cases. Sounds intriguing.

Sunday, July 17, 2005

this is an audio post - click to play

All my new friends on myspace.com

I can't believe the amount of new friends that I have on myspace.com. As soon as I opened an account, I literally had hundreds of new people who wanted to be my friend. I feel like I'm an internet celebrity. Go to www.myspace.com/davidmkim or click on the title of this post. You can make your own webpage too. You'll get tons of requests from strangers who want to be your friend. It's been fun so far. Sorry to my new myspace.com friends regarding the fact that I can't respond back to you promptly. My email is flooded with too many requests and junk right now. Generally, they're a great bunch of people.


Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Some humor I got from work

The chicken and the horse... On the farm lived a chicken and a horse, both of whom loved to play together. One day the two were playing, when the horse fell into a bog andbegan to sink. Scared for his life, the horse whinnied for the chicken togo get the farmer for help! Off the chicken ran, back to the farm. Arriving at the farm, he searched and searched for the farmer, but to no avail,for he had gone to town with the only tractor. Running around, the chickenspied the farmer's new Harley. Finding the keys in the ignition, the chickensped off with a length of rope hoping he still had time to save his friend'slife. Back at the bog, the horse was surprised, but happy, to see the chicken arriveon the shiny Harley, and he managed to get a hold of the loop of rope the chicken tossed to him. After tying the other end to the rear bumper of thefarmer's bike, the chicken then drove slowly forward and, with the aid of thepowerful bike, rescued the horse! Happy and proud, the chicken rode the Harley back to the farmhouse, and thefarmer was none the wiser when he returned. The friendship between the twoanimals was cemented: Best Buddies, Best Pals. A few weeks later, the chicken fell into a mud pit, and soon, he too, beganto sink and cried out to the horse to save his life! The horse thought a moment,walked over, and straddled the large puddle. Looking underneath, he toldthe chicken to grab his hangy-down thing and he would then lift him out of the pit. The chicken got a good grip, and the horse pulled him up and out, savinghis life. The moral of the story? (yep, there's a moral!) "When You're Hung Like A Horse, You Don't Need A Harley To Pick Up Chicks!"



********************************************************************
Don't delete this because it looks weird..... Believe it or not you can read it. **********************************************************************

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdgnieg The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at CmabrigdeUinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer inwaht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olnyiprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. Therset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs isbcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod asa wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt

Saturday, July 09, 2005

My Space

I just created a myspace account. You can check it out at

www.myspace.com/davidmkim

I just made it so it's pretty plain so far. Now, I have to work on more sites other than this blog. This is getting to be more and more work. It's fun, but I'm running out of valuable time playing Xbox games.

I have other things going on besides working on my blog and my homepage, you know. I have to go to work, cook and clean, and try to play videogames. So, I'm pretty swamped right now.




work

Thursday, July 07, 2005

Philly

I just came back from Philly as part of my job. I'm back at the LA office. I haven't had much time to settle down and take care of my stuff like my blog in a long time. Lately, I've been biking to work. I stuff my backpack with my change of clothes and my lunch. It's almost 10 miles from my house to work. I like biking to work, because it gives me a good workout. This way, I can get my exercise done at the same time that I commute. That's Korean efficiency. I used to bike to church when I was in San Diego. That was a 20 mile ride from my place to church.

Anyway, I had fun in Philly. I didn't have much time to sightsee much. Some of my co-workers and I went to Philly at night to check it out. We went to South Street and had dinner there for awhile. Then, we went to the Continental to have a few drinks. I took some pictures. Unfortunately, I didn't take my digital camera. I'm going to scan the pictures once I develop the film. I still have quite a few shots left on my camera at this point though. I'm planning on taking more pictures once I go to my next travel destination for work. I pretty much find out last minute.

I had a Philly Cheese Steak Sandwich. They call them Hoagies there.

Philly is really beautiful and green there. They had bad freeway signs though. We got lost going to work every single day. Unlike, California where the freeway sign is there to let you know what freeway you're on like the 10 for instance, in Pennsylvania, they have the upcoming freeway signs. If you're new to the area, you wouldn't know which lane to be in to stay on the freeway you're on.

We stayed at the Hilton Valley Lodge in King of Prussia. I'm sorry to say that that Hilton needs some renovating. The King of Prussia mall was nice. It's huge. They often had 2 or 3 of the same stores because the mall was so big. Actually, I think it was 3 big malls right next to each other. The malls had every good store there.

That's it for now. I'm really tired because I haven't been sleeping much since I started working. I have to get up early tomorrow to bike to work.

Thursday, June 23, 2005

Triumph: I keed

Click on the title of this post to watch Triumph in his wacky "I keed" music video. He's a pretty good rapper. Take a hike, Eminem.

Monday, June 20, 2005

Killzone 2 (PS3)

This a sample clip of the types of games we can expect from the next generation Playstation 3. It's processors and graphics chips are supposed to be twice as powerful as the fastest chips we have on the market today. That's incredible. The graphics are supposed to be movie quality.

Sony says that this scene from Killzone 2 is done in real time (not prerendered). Nobody seems to believe it though. I guess we'll find out the truth when the game does come out. I'm drooling over the next gen games.

I predict that in the future games will be like the Matrix. We can plug our minds into computer generated worlds and totally immerse ourselves in them. That will be trippy.

Sunday, June 19, 2005

Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children

Click on the title of this post to view the trailer for Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children.

This movie is going to be on the PSP (Playstation Portable). Sony's using their own UMD disk. I don't know why it's called a Universal Media Disk when you can only play it on the PSP.

Anyway, the trailer looks awesome. You can see other FF VII trailers on happypuppy.com. Check out other videoclips of other games while you're there. I can't wait for XBox 360 and PS3 to come out in the coming months.

The Advent Children movie is supposed to take place 1 year after the end of the story from the original FF7 game. So far, the movie doesn't make any sense. I guess we'll have to see it to know what's going on. People who played the game will undoubtedly appreciate the movie the most. I spent most of my free time on that game. I totally think that it was time well spent. The game literally changed the videogame industry with its storyline and graphics. People who didn't play it missed out big time, in my opinion.

It looks like they brought in all the characters from the game too. Cloud Strife, the main character, has the biggest sword you've ever seen in your life. He's totally compensating for something. Look at him! They made him look like a pansy-ass metrosexual.

This movie looks much better than that flop of a movie, Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within. That movie played in theaters but didn't even compare to the cutscene movies from games like FF X and even FF VIII.

Okay, that's enough of my geeky ranting. Enjoy the clip. I hope you love games as much as I do.

Friday, June 17, 2005

Thursday, June 16, 2005

David's Pathetic First Attempt at Audioblogging

this is an audio post - click to play


Click on the button above to play my audioblog.



You can see Tom Green's blog at:

www.TomGreen.com

He has some audio and video blogs on his site.

I'd like to post some videoblogs later on. If you know of a good site that hosts free videoblogging, let me know. I want to post up some videoblogs of my latest antics so you guys can share in my life.

I hate my voice when I hear it being played back to me. Do I really sound like that? I might stop audioblogging if my voice doesn't improve. Geez.

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Star Dudes: Return of the Dude

This is for you Star Wars fans who just can't get enough of the franchise. Watch this videoclip of Star Dudes: Return of the Dude. It's a cute cartoon recreation of Star Wars: Return of the Jedi. It's kind of silly that they all call each other "dude". That's so 80's, G.



Click on the title of this post or click on the link below:

http://download.theforce.net/theater/returndude/returnofthedude.html



You can also watch other Star Wars episodes on:

http://www.dudestudios.com/mainpage.htm



I search for all the cool things on the internet for you so you won't have to waste time on viewing crap and risk getting viruses.

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Triumph the Weatherdog in Hawaii

Check out another funny videoclip from Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. He's filling in for a weatherman in Hawaii. I think he does a great job.




Check out my site often for great jokes, links to funny videos, and funny pics. I do all the searching for you so you won't have to. This way you don't have to risk getting viruses from sucky websites.

Let me know what types of stuff you want to see and I'll try to post it here.

Monday, June 13, 2005

Wacko for Jacko

As you guys know, Michael Jackson was acquitted on all counts of the child molestation trial. Celebrities seem to be getting off with all sorts of stuff these days.

Here's another clip of Triumph the Insult Comic Dog bashing on MJ and his fans outside the courthouse a couple of weeks ago. I love that dog!

Click on the title of this post or the link below to see the funny video clip.

http://www.milkandcookies.com/links/31636/

Sunday, June 12, 2005

Jackass in Amsterdam

Check out this insane interview of Steve-O from MTV's Jackass and Wild Boyz on in Amsterdam tv show. Dang! You can do anything on tv over there!



Click on the Title of this post or click on this link below:

http://www.sacredcow.com/media/source/other_artists/tom_rhodes/rhodes_steveo.wmv


I'd like to go to Amsterdam someday. They don't believe in censorship over there. I hate censorship too!

Sorry for not posting too much lately. I've been working every single day. I've been working some pretty long hours so, I'm kinda tired. I love the job I have right now though. I'll try to post more stuff soon for your guys. You're my people and I love y'all.

Friday, June 10, 2005

Wild Boys-Zebra Costume

I've been busy working until very late this week. I'm working 7 days a week now.

Here's a pretty funny videoclip from MTV's Wild Boys. These 2 clowns dress up in a zebra costume and run aroundwith zebras in Africa. Since they're not as fast real zebras, they get attacked by lions.

Click on the title of this post to watch. Here's the link:

http://www.milkandcookies.com/links/27305/