Some churchy jokes

Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to hermother, "Why is the bride dressed in white?" "Because white is thecolor of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life." Thechildthought about this for a moment, then said, "So why is the groom wearingblack?"

---------------------------------------------------A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running as fast as shecould, trying not to be late for Bible class. As she ran she prayed,"Dear Lord, please don't let me be late! Dear Lord, please don't let mebelate!"While she was running and praying, she tripped on a curb and fell,getting her clothes dirty and tearing her dress. She got up, brushedherselfoff, and started running again. As she ran she once again began to pray,"Dear Lord, please don't let me be late... But please don't shove meeither!"


-------------------------------------------------A little girl became restless as the preacher's sermon dragged on andon. Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered, "Mommy, if wegive him the money now, will he let us go?"

-----------------------------------------------An elderly woman died last month. Having never married, she requestedno male pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions for her memorialservice she wrote, "They wouldn't take me out while I was alive, I don'twantthem to take me out when I'm dead.

----------------------------------------------A police recruit was asked during the exam, "What would you do if youhad to arrest your own mother?" He said, "Call for backup."

---------------------------------------------A Sunday school teacher asked the children just before she dismissedthem to go to church, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?"Anniereplied, "Because people are sleeping."

----------------------------------------------Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesuswith them to Jerusalem. A small child replied "They couldn't get a babysitter."

------------------------------------------------A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with herfive and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor thyfather and thy mother," she asked "Is there a commandment that teachesushowto treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one littleboyanswered, "Thou shall not kill."

-----------------------------------------------At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything,including human beings. Little Johnny seemed especially intent when theytold himhow Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs. Later in the week hismothernoticed him lying down as though he were ill, and said, "Johnny, what isthe matter?" Little Johnny responded, "I have pain in my side. I thinkI'mgoing to have a wife."

------------------------------------------------Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after hearing strongpreachingon the devil. One said to the other, "What do you think about all thisSatanstuff?" The other boy replied, "Well, you know how Santa Claus turnedout.It's probably just your dad."

------------------------------------------------"How come you're late?" asked the bartender, as the blonde waitresswalked into the bar. "It was awful," she explained. "I was walking downElmstreet and there was a terrible accident. A man was thrown from his carandhewas lying in the middle of the street. His leg was broken, his skull wasfractured, and there was blood everywhere. Thank God I took thatfirst-aid course." "What did you do?" asked the bartender. "I sat downandput myhead between my knees to keep from fainting.

B.A.S.E. jumping

Click on the title of this post to see an awesome B.A.S.E. jumping video. I want to try this so bad. All I need to do is make a parachute or steal Mary Poppins' umbrella.

The Sith Rejects

Click on the title of this post to see an animated presentation of The Sith Rejects. Little did we know that there were a lot of Darths before George Lucas chose Vader.

Rosso

Check out Rockstar Brian Greenwood's band, Rosso, with these links:

www.rosso-band.com

www.myspace.com/briangreenwood

I met him at work. He's an attorney, rock star, poet, and a tennis coach. He has amazing talent. Sarah and I are going to see him in his next concert.

Hey, Brian.





You can also buy his book, "Hate to Feel" from BarnesandNoble.com:

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=Uh6ZunrBJ6&isbn=0595228410&itm=1

It has really good reviews.

The Law Firm

Watch "The Law Firm" on NBC Thursday, July 28, 2005-9/8 PM. Click on the link to see my friend from law school, Kelly Chang, go for $250,000. I hope she wins.

http://www.nbc.com/The_Law_Firm/bios/

It's a reality tv show about attorneys. It looks like The Apprentice, except it deals with lawyers working on real cases. Sounds intriguing.

All my new friends on myspace.com

I can't believe the amount of new friends that I have on myspace.com. As soon as I opened an account, I literally had hundreds of new people who wanted to be my friend. I feel like I'm an internet celebrity. Go to www.myspace.com/davidmkim or click on the title of this post. You can make your own webpage too. You'll get tons of requests from strangers who want to be your friend. It's been fun so far. Sorry to my new myspace.com friends regarding the fact that I can't respond back to you promptly. My email is flooded with too many requests and junk right now. Generally, they're a great bunch of people.

Some humor I got from work

The chicken and the horse... On the farm lived a chicken and a horse, both of whom loved to play together. One day the two were playing, when the horse fell into a bog andbegan to sink. Scared for his life, the horse whinnied for the chicken togo get the farmer for help! Off the chicken ran, back to the farm. Arriving at the farm, he searched and searched for the farmer, but to no avail,for he had gone to town with the only tractor. Running around, the chickenspied the farmer's new Harley. Finding the keys in the ignition, the chickensped off with a length of rope hoping he still had time to save his friend'slife. Back at the bog, the horse was surprised, but happy, to see the chicken arriveon the shiny Harley, and he managed to get a hold of the loop of rope the chicken tossed to him. After tying the other end to the rear bumper of thefarmer's bike, the chicken then drove slowly forward and, with the aid of thepowerful bike, rescued the horse! Happy and proud, the chicken rode the Harley back to the farmhouse, and thefarmer was none the wiser when he returned. The friendship between the twoanimals was cemented: Best Buddies, Best Pals. A few weeks later, the chicken fell into a mud pit, and soon, he too, beganto sink and cried out to the horse to save his life! The horse thought a moment,walked over, and straddled the large puddle. Looking underneath, he toldthe chicken to grab his hangy-down thing and he would then lift him out of the pit. The chicken got a good grip, and the horse pulled him up and out, savinghis life. The moral of the story? (yep, there's a moral!) "When You're Hung Like A Horse, You Don't Need A Harley To Pick Up Chicks!"



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Don't delete this because it looks weird..... Believe it or not you can read it. **********************************************************************

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdgnieg The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at CmabrigdeUinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer inwaht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olnyiprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. Therset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs isbcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod asa wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt

My Space

I just created a myspace account. You can check it out at

www.myspace.com/davidmkim

I just made it so it's pretty plain so far. Now, I have to work on more sites other than this blog. This is getting to be more and more work. It's fun, but I'm running out of valuable time playing Xbox games.

I have other things going on besides working on my blog and my homepage, you know. I have to go to work, cook and clean, and try to play videogames. So, I'm pretty swamped right now.




work

Philly

I just came back from Philly as part of my job. I'm back at the LA office. I haven't had much time to settle down and take care of my stuff like my blog in a long time. Lately, I've been biking to work. I stuff my backpack with my change of clothes and my lunch. It's almost 10 miles from my house to work. I like biking to work, because it gives me a good workout. This way, I can get my exercise done at the same time that I commute. That's Korean efficiency. I used to bike to church when I was in San Diego. That was a 20 mile ride from my place to church.

Anyway, I had fun in Philly. I didn't have much time to sightsee much. Some of my co-workers and I went to Philly at night to check it out. We went to South Street and had dinner there for awhile. Then, we went to the Continental to have a few drinks. I took some pictures. Unfortunately, I didn't take my digital camera. I'm going to scan the pictures once I develop the film. I still have quite a few shots left on my camera at this point though. I'm planning on taking more pictures once I go to my next travel destination for work. I pretty much find out last minute.

I had a Philly Cheese Steak Sandwich. They call them Hoagies there.

Philly is really beautiful and green there. They had bad freeway signs though. We got lost going to work every single day. Unlike, California where the freeway sign is there to let you know what freeway you're on like the 10 for instance, in Pennsylvania, they have the upcoming freeway signs. If you're new to the area, you wouldn't know which lane to be in to stay on the freeway you're on.

We stayed at the Hilton Valley Lodge in King of Prussia. I'm sorry to say that that Hilton needs some renovating. The King of Prussia mall was nice. It's huge. They often had 2 or 3 of the same stores because the mall was so big. Actually, I think it was 3 big malls right next to each other. The malls had every good store there.

That's it for now. I'm really tired because I haven't been sleeping much since I started working. I have to get up early tomorrow to bike to work.